Aside

By Charles Swanson



Excerpt from the journal of Gilligan Eggars:

Still haven't worked on my new article. If my editors weren't still silenced by the Summit they'd be chewing me out like it was nobody's business. Lucky for me, I guess.

Rex came home for lunch today. He doesn't often do that, which is justifiable given the distance from the house to Campus. He came home to wipe a new cell phone of his. He showed me all of the malware on it: amateur hackers bribing someone to put their software in, assets of the US military, assets of the Chinese military, things that were only identifiable as "not beneficial"... it was shocking. Not even a soft wipe got rid of it all; some of the Chinese stuff was hardcoded. He offered to wipe my phone, but I declined. I'm not sure I even want to know.

Later, was eating an inter-meal snack in the basement Lab when I witnessed a rather odd back-and-forth. Rex was sitting in a chair, quite enthralled in whatever he was doing, when his assistant came in with a bowl of jelly beans. He looked up from his work and said:

"What's this?"

"Jelly beans. I thought you could use some quantized sustenance units to fine-tune your mood."

Rex took them, and rooted around in the bowl for a moment. "Looks like you picked out all the most endocrine-active ones. Thanks. Should I take this to mean you've forgiven me for the Pluto incident?" If Rex has ever looked hopeful, this was it. It's impossible to actually tell.

His assistant was more visibly emotive. I also understand her concerns more, considering he duped all of us equally. "No, Rex. I will never forgive you for that. I'll never forgiven you for a few things. But eventually our ongoing interpersonal growth will make them negligible."

"So... while the damage will always be there, never diminishing in absolute magnitude, it will become asymptotically less relevant to our relationship?" This prompted a nod from his assistant. He smiled. "That's good. There are lots of worse alternatives, anyway."

I'm not sure I know what that means. If it means what I think it means, then his assistant will hold a grudge forever? That doesn't sound like her. There was a pause of a few moments. When Rex next spoke, I was mostly done eating.

"By the way, yesterday was exactly one year from when I started to track my relative risks of dying. I'd like to present my results. Now, it may be a little nonsensical because I usually renormalize any probability with the probability that I'll still be alive tomorrow... It's a good way of avoiding difficult-to-calculate things like me being a Boltzmann brain or the universe cascading into a lower state of entropy so far unheard-of. So the numbers could theoretically be over 100%..."

"Rex, I don't care. What did you find?"

Rex pulled up a document on his screen. I was too far away to read it, but I got the gist from the assistant's sputter of disbelief. A few moments after beginning to read, she pushed herself from the bench on which she'd leaned and looked at Rex disbelievingly.

"What? Dear, this is silly. How can your number one be 'car accident'? You deal with energy levels in excess of the rest of civilized humanity! Daily! You just jumped from a rocket-plane to a nuclear-powered cruise missile over the Pacific! Ninjas target you pretty much continuously! You actually did die! Recently! That godawful monstrosity of a dodecahedron..." She stopped. She'll never bring up the last point in any serious manner. It must be her way of coping.

"But I take precautions. Take a look: Here's the effect of my radiation resistance gear, here's the emergency cutoff system to my experiments, here's where I factor in the presence of my fantastic array of belt tools... It's all here. It's not as if I made up these numbers, or any condition from which they arise. These are objectively calculated. I'll give you the full workup, and you can tell me what – precisely – doesn't follow." This is Rex's closest approximation of loaded words. Where most people have words with connotations that are clearly couterfactual as their most touchy trigger, Rex has the immutability of his mathematics. It's a common theme I've seen among people who take to math in school.

What was most interesting, though, was that Rex wasn't obviously winning the argument. I've seen him talk down crowds and singular madmen alike, from the smallest detail to the most profound underlying basis. Rex can do odd things with words, but he wasn't doing it now. He could have convinced her and me alike, simply by turning on that thing he does.

His assistant looked resigned anyway. She's had more of these arguments with Rex than I have, and that's saying something. It looked as if this would simply be another case of her dropping it. That can't be healthy.

Suddenly her eyes went wide and she exclaimed, "Rex, is that poor creature a bird?!"

He looked down at his lab bench and said, "Does this mean you've given up on disputing my claim?"

"Don't change the subject. You have ten seconds to convince me you are not a monster."

At this point I got curious, and craned my neck to see what the fuss was. On the bench, held down with clamps, there was something that might or might not have been biological. I hadn't noticed it before.

Rex began speaking immediately. "I have caught several birds to test the oft-quoted but ill-tested wisdom that birds can detect magnetic fields with the sophistication and natural ease that millions of years of evolution necessarily brings to animal senses. I do not kill the birds, and when they are done I improve them as a way of making up for the experience." He then stopped, contented that he had proven that he was not a monster. I should keep track of the incidents in which Rex scares me.

His assistant looked as ill as I felt. "Is this because that bird stole your hat yesterday?"

"No."

She buried her head in her hands and exhaled, as if frustrated from talking to a brick wall, stubborn child, or rationalist. After a moment she looked up again, visibly prepared for the worst, and asked "Improve them how?"

"Gut fauna. They're able to more efficiently digest some of the previously insoluble detritus on which modern city birds live. I also gave them immunities they didn't have before. Aren't you going to ask me what I discovered?"

For a moment I thought his assistant would break, snap at him in an entirely justified rage. But instead she simply put a hand on his arm and said, "I'm worried about you."

He was long gone. His eyes had darted over to a monitor, on which the City from a quite literally birds-eye view was displayed. Around one particular area of downtown, there was a throbbing rainbow of color, obviously localized on the scenery, not the retina of the bird. Whenever the field of view shifted, the blob would follow the buildings. "Would you look at this! This is an anomalous reading if I've ever found one. Let's go investigate."

"Rex, why would I come with you?"

"Because you want to know what that blob of intense changing magnetic field covering a large region of downtown is just as much as I do. Also, you have yet to ride my new motorcycle."

It was true. As soon as he called her attention to it, she'd been at war with herself, her eyes darting between the monitor and her own clenched fists. No one should have to live that way, and I have no idea why she sticks with him, but sure as clockwork she shook her head, sighed, and said, "I'll go get my helmet."

As they left, she began to say something like "if you accumulate things about which I'll never forgive you faster than our own interpersonal growth..."

They arrived back late that night. They'd found and neutralized a cult of disgruntled City Transit bus drivers who were trying to summon some ancient terror or another. It made quite a story.







FIN