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TOP
STORIES
CMU
Bookstore Sells Helper Monkeys for Chronically Lazy
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Where
are you going to be on Monday, October 9th at 3:00pm? As I write,
the Carnegie Mellon University bookstore is stocking their shelves
with a new product to help the school's Chronically Lazy (Chronchitis
Lazitus) population.
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Hamerschlag
To Be Freed from Carbonite, Have Nose Job
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A
long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, Hamerschlag angered the
lords of CMU. He had committed the unspeakable crime of having both
a dorm and an academic building named after him, thus making it
impossible to tell one from the other. This infuriated the department
of the Campus Master Plan, who kept having to draw maps where circles
meant the academic buildings and diamonds meant the dorms, and hope
that the minions of the campus didn't get confused.
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